Itchy, itchy, itchy

 

Last night was the first night in my house where I thought dear God I'm in Africa, kill me now!  Those of you that know I have a flare for the dramatic are probably rolling your eyes, but it is so DAMN HOT HERE.  There's been a quick succession of storms about the size of Katrina that have hit the northern parts of Mozambique and Madagascar over the past couple of weeks.  3 I think in 3 weeks.  That has kept the humidity up for days.  I'm a prickly pear due to this heat rash I have and every single one of my friends is a crabby moody bastard.  Can you blame them though?  Remember East coast Augusts when you would be reading the newspaper and the whole thing would just be saturated?  That's what it's like here.  Just imagine 10-15 days of it in a row without the temperature ever really going down.  Kinda makes you lose your train of thought, like I just did.  I'm in my office right now with the curtains closed, the light off and the fan on high.  I'm desperate to just get the heat down.  The thing that is embarrassing, the Mozambicans are just so used to this, they hardly break a sweat… me I've got my own private Victoria Falls streaming down my forehead.

 

This weekend will be a nice break.  It's time for some regional meetings in Maputo.  We stay at this little holiday resort on the coast of the city called Kaya Kwanga.  It's a really nice place.  It was my first taste of Mozambique!  I remember when I got here I thought the place was a little sleezy but with some refurbishments, it's all nice a new now.  I'm looking forward to the chance just to get away for a couple of days.  It is my monthly shower time and I also heard that Sweeney Todd is  now being sold on the streets in Maputo.  Gotta go and get it.  J

 

 

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~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

The Weirdest Thing

 

Don't you just love it when you are right?  I mentioned yesterday something about my landlord just creating problems with my house.  Well, I talked to my boss and he said that he and only he can renegotiate a price for the rent.  So I told my landlord to come to the office and talk.  He showed up today and every single person in the office was shocked.  I didn't even recognize him.  He's usually wandering around shirtless and drunk in his yard.  Sitting in the office here, he looked like a Mafioso.  I swear to you, fake leather shoes and belt, black pants that were so creased it looked like they had tent poles in them, and dark glasses.  That gave it away that he was drunk.  But, my boss was really calm and collected; he asked what we were doing here, (Mozambican formalities) and then started the meeting by asking to look at the old rent agreement.  My landlord handed it over and the agreement said that it is automatically renewable for 2 years once it expired, which was about 6 months ago.  My landlord starts saying that nothing is owed by any party (he actually owes my boss 2,500 meticais because of repairs my work paid for on the house.  The landlord says that all the proper discounts have been made and he is just present to talk about renegotiating a contract.  My boss wanted to see proof of the discounts.  Senhor Lukas got in a huff, grabbed the paperwork, mumbled something about coming back, and ran off – that was two hours ago.  Most of my colleagues want me to move now because a "vida negra" will continue happening.  The landlord obviously wants 600 meticais a month rent for a house that we worked on.  Oh well, at lest I see that I've got a lot of people on my side!  I'll keep you updated.

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~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

Africa’s opportunists are……

Africa's opportunists are……

 

You fill in the blank here.  I am so fed up with people seeing white skin and thinking money, money, money.  I can take it when it's just beggars on the street, but when it's people like oh say my next door neighbor who has had other Peace Corps Volunteers live in his yard, then it drives me bonkers.  I do have to tell you though, and I'm not making this up, the man is stupid.  I don't know what he's thinking but he is just a STUPID human being.  He comes to me one night at 9:30 at night saying that my rent has gone up to 600 meticais a month.  My rent has been 250 meticais for as long as there has been a volunteer living in the house.  This guy said it is because of all the new things done to the house that the rent will go up.  To make a long story short, all of the repairs on the house have been done by Peace Corps or by ADECI, the organization I work for. 

 

This morning I woke up to him just being his sleazy self saying he couldn't come into the city to talk with ADECI because he doesn't know where the office is.  I'm sorry but that's bullshit.  He once proudly said to me that he is born and bred Maxixe, pretty much on the exact same land where the house now stands.  He's just trying to take advantage of me as a foreigner and as someone who "apparently doesn't know the system."  I've been visiting people at this house for months now.  I just feel so angry towards him because he knows I know he's trying to rip me off, but he's still trying.  If he would just let me alone for the 250 mets a month until I leave here, then he'd have a house full of stuff when I leave, if he continues to harass me, he'll be left with the four walls….grrrr….

--
~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

Even after two years

Yesterday was quite a weird day for me. Something I like so much about Africa is that everyday is really a new day. There is always the opportunity that you will wake up tomorrow and things will be better. It happened to me again today.

Yesterday, I had the second of 3 parts for the gender training sessions. This week was for the professors/teachers that will be helping out in the projects at the primary schools we have invited to participate this year. It is a wonderful program that really puts the power of after school programs into the hands of these schools - something I personally think is needed here. It gives the students an opportunity to do something else after school besides going to fetch water and the older ones get involved with teachers. Yes even in primary school. So we were on the back veranda of this old Portuguese sporting club. It looks right out into the bay over towards the capital city of the province. Right now there is a tropical cyclone in the channel between here and Madagascar, it's not supposed to come to land, but it is definitely affecting the weather around here. For the past couple of days, we have had TORRENTIAL rains that come through every half an hour or so. Sometimes it gets so much, you can't hear yourself over the pounding on the roof. Tin roofs in the tropics, i wonder who thought of that idea. Anyway, I saw some crazy big white caps raise up on the bay and just felt incredibly thankful for the development that I have seen on my side of the bay. I don't have to go over to the other side of the bay unless I want to go to certain restaurants. But, everyone in the training thought it was crazy that the boats were still going, I saw that they weren't loading them to heavy but that didn't matter, I saw a boat crest over a wave and the trough was just too deep. It didn't go down (thank God, most Mozambicans can't swim) but it definitely limped to shore. All of this for 12,50 meticais. Even in this former People's Republic, the people are still driven by money gods?!?!?!

The other thing I wanted to write about today is how grateful I am that I have a background that encouraged me to challenge, to question, to think outside the box and most importantly to be accepting of people who are not like you - even if you don't agree with them as I don't with republicans. Anyway, I know I don't speak Portuguese properly, but then again neither do Mozambicans. I speak it pretty damn well too and grammatically better than a lot of my fellow teachers at my old school. The thing that gets me is I had to lead these teachers (many of whom know me) in a cultural sensitivity class. I was talking and people weren't paying attention and then when they realized that I was speaking Portuguese and could be understood, they could TRY to understand but didn't. They just sat with these dumb looks on their faces. My favorite was when someone wanted to ask for another piece of poster paper to bring back to his group. I knew what he was asking for out of context and because I'm used to the way people try to speak English around here. But what he was either 4 free shits for group or group shits for free. I don't know! I couldn't contain myself and just handed him the "sheets." Later on in the day, I had to hand out the students guides for the ESH program. I had to hand out 6 each and then get them to sign off for them. Let me just say it was bedlam. I yelled at the teachers that we didn't have enough packs for everyone so I had to break them up into packs of 6 and couldn't give them a carrying case to bring them home. (You see the packs of ten were put into a nice little bundle to carry) Oh the bitching and complaining and the people jumping the lines so they could just do whatever they want. I let them take the packaging to wrap up their books, but then when they weren't looking I went and tore the packaging off so they couldn't use it. They all laughed. I hate it when I'm thought of as a complete idiot because the others around me can't think outside of the box. I wonder what I'll be like when I have children! Any thoughts?

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Now playing: Freshly Ground - Pot Belly
via FoxyTunes bay side sporting club.

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Now playing: Freshly Ground - Ma'cheri
via FoxyTunes

Gender Awareness when Women are not allowed to Speak

So as many of you know, I've moved jobs to a Mozambican run NGO where my duties have been completely changed around.  Basically I no longer teach kids who really don't give a crap about being in school.  I am now the local computer genius in my office, that spends his days making basic repairs on computers you can practically see through they are so riddled with worms.  They wonder why it takes so long for the computer to start up.

 

Anyway, last week was the first week that I actually got out of the office.  As my luck would have it, the 3 days I spent outside of my nice air conditioned office had to have temperatures of above 40 degrees Celsius and humidity of what felt like 150 percent.  My office runs this nationwide program Escola sem HIV/SIDA.  It's School Aids awareness program to get it into the heads of primary students the necessity of protecting yourself against AIDS.  Last week we had the principals of these elementary schools for a three day "gender mainstreaming" workshop.  I'm sure you don't even know what that means.  I sure didn't before I got to Peace Corps.  But I live in a society where girls aren't deemed worthy enough of higher education.  When a family has to choose between whether a girl or a guy has to go on to higher education, it will be the man without a second thought. Yet there were at least 6 female head teachers sitting in front of me at this conference.  The thing that annoyed me though was that they were doing just that.  They were sitting, nothing more.  My colleague asked at one point what everything thinks it means to be a man and a women.  The list that came up was hilarious.

Men are courageous, gallant, strong, handsome, hard workers, basically a perfect Adonis.

Now when the list came to be made for women, not one of them spoke!  The men made up this list of what it means to be a woman (since they are such experts!) subservient, obedient, mother, wife, basically everything  had to do with someone else and not with the woman herself.  I couldn't take it anymore and interrupted by getting up there and saying that none of the men knew anything about being a woman and never could because of pure "physical property" that is between their legs.  This was after a conversation about how men could never carry water and women could never work on the road was had.  I've carried water on my head 20 liters is heavy and it hurts!  Most times I pass by the road crews, I see them napping in the shade of a tree.  I went on by explaining that I come from a culture where the man carries everything for the woman, here it is the opposite.  I have Mag to thank about that.  Anyway, the participants laughed, thought I was weird and it went in one ear and out the other.

Is listening that hard?

--
~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

Communication is a Wonderful Thing

 

This year is such a different experience than my past two years of service.  Now that I am in the big city and have two site mates who are within a ten minute walk from my house, I feel that communication is so necessary that if anything goes wrong, it's not exactly like we can hide from each other.  There are 5 PCVs in this city, 2 live about 4 k further down the road.  Another thing about communication that I've seen in the past week is with my landlord.  He saw an opportunity to make an extra 350 MTn off of me and took the opportunity to tell me that my house had gone from 250 MTn to 600 Mtn in one night basically.  I talked to people at work and they handed me a couple of receipts that showed work they had done on the house and told me he had to pay them back now (which he won't) if he raises the rent (which he didn't.)  He has to come and discuss it with my boss because it is my organization that pays the whole $10 a month rent and not me.  He's not going to come to the office and I'm comfortable now talking to everyone as an equal at the office, as long as I don't have a bad Portuguese day!

 

The other thing that is changing my life so much this year is Internet access.  My job got broadband and they need someone to run the network and just make sure that viruses don't come in.  You should see how many I found when I did the first sweep with Norton, thanks Noel.  But this is letting me keep on top of keeping in touch this year, it lets me upload items and send this pithy blogs to you all which I know certain people are reading thanks to a friend of mine who gave me this link that makes me think she works for MI-6.  Hopefully I'm not blowing here cover and causing some sort of leak on the other side of the Atlantic!  J   When I was back in the States for my month home leave, I was astounded by so much of the technology I saw.  I got involved in Facebook and I think that's one of the best things I could have done.  It's so much cleaner than Myspace in my opinion and it doesn't take up the precious bandwidth that Myspace does when people put songs and god knows what else onto their pages.  But the best thing about Facebook for me is I found a friend who I wronged some years back for very stupid reasons.  I found this person and "friended" them on Facebook and to my complete and utter joy this person accepted!  I still haven't written a complete note to this person but I will soon.  There is a flip side to this inter-connected life we lead though.  I haven't heard from another friend in about a year – I have NO idea what for.  However with the help of some international "agents" who gave me the link I can see that this person is still reading the blog.  Twilight Zone material huh? 

 

 

--
~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

PRICE CONTROL GONE BAD

So the city of Maputo is blockaded today.  As we all now the war in Iraq is going so wonderfully and just pouring oil on to the global market so we all have access to whatever we want.  Oh wait, that's what the president thought would happen, but that is not what is happening.  We've basically managed to close Iraq off of the market and shoot ourselves in the diplomatic foot – but I don't want to get into that.  What I want to talk about is what is happening in Maputo today just in case anyone hears about it.  Kenya news made it home even before I did so I just want to be careful.  First thing, Maputo is 500 K away from me. That's 310 miles and the floods up north are 1000 K from me.  That's 620 miles.  So I'm safe by long shots on both sides.  I actually wish it would rain a bit here.  Just a little bit to keep the dust down and everything.  Anyway, the bus fare in the big cities in this country is absurdly cheap.  Most cities only have it pegged at 5 meticais.  That 20 American cents.  Gas has recently gone up to 35 meticais per liter.  There are 3.75 liters per gallon, so  if gas can cost $5 a gallon here in what was once the most destitute country in the world, it can go up in the States no?  All of these prices are causing consternation amongst the "chapa" owners and operators around the country.  In Maputo, the privately owned buses are raising the price of a ticket 100 percent from 5 meticais to 10.  That's a steep jump for people who earn very little a month, but that's just the thing, people in Maputo don't make nothing a month.  There are substantial amounts of NGOs and foreign companies that are now scrambling to get into Maputo and they pay western salaries.  So I don't understand why this is happening. The drivers want the raise in fare, the government says no, (good communist price control here) the drivers say lower the gas prices then.  The government says we don't have control over that.  The drivers say SCREW YOU then and blockade the city, tires a burning and the city is stopped.  I'm kind of envious of this all for one and one for all attitude.  Let's see though if anything can be accomplished.  In the meantime, I have bought myself a bicycle to get to and from work.

--
~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

Letter from the Prophet Marcus to the Mozambicans….

I don't know if I'm considered sacrilegious because of this title but maybe when I am finished with this blog ya'll will understand.   I've come back from the land of forever connected and now am back at the bottom of the world – or at least Africa that is.  I'm sitting in my cell block of an office after a hard morning of writing reports.  Now, let me tell you how this alter ego of Prophet Marcus showed up.  I'm living in a totally different town and even though it was the big city where I had to come for the past two years and get my mail, do my banking and send the homing pigeons out to Peace Corps on an occasional basis so they don't think I've disappeared into the bush, I was nervous because I didn't know the neighbors too much.  Man oh man do they know me.  Mozambique is a nation obsessed with two, well maybe three things.  The first is Football, or Soccer, the second is 2M (Noel you know what that is) and the third is Brazilian Soap Operas.  There is this new one that just started before I had left to the land of technology and it is called the Prophet and I look like the main character Marcus.  So I have rechristened myself to Marcus, but let me tell you I still don't answer to it at first impulse.  I think I have a certain Samantha McDonough to thank for the dye job.  J  The strangest thing is that I get some sort of preferential treatment because of this resemblance.  I'm not sure if everyone actually thinks I'm a famous Brazilian Soap Star, but they sure act like it.  I keep saying if I were Brazilian, would I have such a horribly foreign accent when I speak Portuguese?  I don't think so!  The other day though, I was by the mCel store waiting for a friend who was inside.  He was taking a long time, I was getting hungry so I went into the store and there was dead silence.  I got brought to the front right away, grabbed what needed to be done out of my friend's hand, got the number back that he wanted and left.  All of this took place in the span of 2 minutes.  The ladies at the desk were giggly and cute because Marcus the Prophet was in front of them.  I had been waiting for my friend for 15 minutes, and he is Mozambican!

 

Besides the new found fame, I've enjoyed being back.  I live in this cute little house.  It's a tiny bit smaller than my other house and the yard is smaller too, but when you move from the suburbs to the city, what can you expect?  I feel like I live in the white rabbit hole though.  Everything is so close and compact.  I don't have to go through my own yard, out the gate and then across a courtyard to get to my latrine.  It's 2 minutes to the side of my house and I've even got a light set up on that side.  I've got a two room little palm tree hut on one side of the house that has a light in it two and I'm going to get a plug put on that side of the house so I can watch movies on the weekend.  I've started my first office job too.  It's a little slow but that's normal in NGOs in this country since it is the start of the new school year.  What's nice is there is a direct internet connection from my office to you all.  So maybe I can put some more pictures up and a regular basis.  Don't forget the prophet is now on Google Pictures too!

 

MP

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~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

Back in the land of....

So I've been busy in America for awhile, but I just wanted to tell ya'll that I'm back into the tell all mode of my life. I've got a new computer, the ability to put all of my photos on to a machine where it doesn't take too long to turn the picture right side up and now I'll share that all with you! But I just wanted to say, I am on Facebook now too. So, I've got Facebook, myspace... photos up to 2007 on kodakgallery and i'll be putting up web albums on Picasa soon. Flickr just doesn't work over here. I'll be typing up some more interesting blogs soon.

ian

Last post from Mozambique in 2007

Ola!

I'm sitting in the office after walking the 2 km from the hotel. Man it's HOT!!! I'm going off to the airport here in Maputo at 13h30 and REALLY excited. Everything is packed, hopefully there will be some good movies on the airplane and I will be going to see my family and also friends and NEW YORK CITY!!!

Some of you may have seen the people track thingy on this blog. A friend of mine in England gave it to me and it's always fun to see how small this world is getting.

I'll be in NYC tomorrow!

Ian

Only in Africa

So I am back from Swaziland. Got into Maputo today. I just wanted to write a quick note because it is 10 pm and I AM TIRED. However, yesterday I went dancing at the royal kraal of Swaziland. In American terms, I basically danced in the royal cow pasture. But what was cool was it was a real ceremony, meaning it would have happened if tourists were there or not. I was one of 6 tourists, all of us were there together from the backpackers I stayed at. The best part though is that the Queen Mother and King of Swaziland were there, the last absolute monarchs of Africa and as the only white people in the group of hundreds, we got brought to the front and danced in front of Their Majesties... with cow dung on our feet because we had to walk through well, the royal cow shit.

Hi from the Swaz!

Here I sit in Swaziland. I tried to get away to a country where I wouldn't be known. I don't think that is possible anymore. I feel like a minor celebrity in southern Africa. I woke up this morning in Mozambique and walked to Swaziland. The money changers and the border guards all recognized me as a PCV. I got the bus to the biggest city, Manzini and went to go to KFC, just because I could. I walk in and hear a you must be Ian, I knew you were coming here. A KFC in MANZINI come on people, can you get any more random then that? Anyway, I ate some food, went to the bank and tried to find the Spar supermarket. Considering I have a backpack it didn't work out. I went to Shoprite. Then I was walking to the bus station and passed by the internet cafe. I saw some more people that know me. Hopefully when I get to the game park, the zebras won't be recognizing me!

More soon

As I sit here listening to Diamonds

As I sit here listening to Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes by Paul Simon, I think of what has happened in the past 2 years of my life – has it really been two years?   I love Africa dearly.  This has been the experience of a lifetime and I know all of you are thinking, with YFU, Friend's World, etc, doesn't this boy have his share of 'experiences of a lifetime.'   I don't think I have though.  Just today, I was freaking out because I realized I only have 2 weeks left in Homoine.   This is the town I've called home in Mozambique for two years.  Through think or thin Homoine has always been there for me.  Now it's time to say goodbye.   It's going to be hard, but it's time to move on to the next point in my life – even if it is only 21 kilometers away.  I'm just finished with my life at this stage.   Then I sit here and think how blessed I am that I can just say "I'm finished" and move on.  Please God, let me find some sort of career that enables me to continue along this line.   The joy of being in Africa is that if I have a bad day, I will always have tomorrow to look forward to.  Or in some cases, I can look forward to a time maybe about an hour later.   Life here tends to be an emotional whirlwind.  Mozambicans are always ready to party and take any excuse for it.   So I'm going to bow out gracefully and not through a party for my going away.  After all, I'm not going away.

 

I had an interesting conversation with the Brazilian in town today.  He recently got into a fight with some English ex-pats two towns over because of a project we had all done together.   I don't know if you remember, but I invited a group to my town to do a musical performance (concerning AIDS, as everything in my life seems to be concerning now) and we all went out for this crazy dinner afterwards.   Well, you put 2 Brazilians, a Portuguese, 2 Mozambicans, 2 Belgians, an Austrian, a Frenchman and an American at a table together and out comes a very interesting conversation – which was recorded, unbeknownst to everyone but the person who pressed play on the recording machine.   My friend, the Brazilian, got very mad because he is working on his own material and he wouldn't want this recording published unless he was certain of all that he said.   But getting back to the conversation I had with him today, he was calling them all under achievers in their own countries so they come here to an under developed country and suddenly they are gods.   That got me thinking, am I a second rate underachiever that doesn't have the ability to make it in my own country – or can't?

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~Ian~
+258 825 232 821
www.weltwanderlust.blogspot.com

As I sit here listening to Paul Simon

I wonder if there is anyone reading this out there still?

Feliz Dia Das Bruxas!

So today is Halloween. I remember when I was a kid, I think I’d start planning my Halloween costume right as day One of October came along. Forgive me all for writing such a banal ( I don’t know if that is the right word) blog after my last one, but I need to just look on the bright side of things. The bright side of things came in a classic African Market Tee Shirt purchase. The color of the bright side of things is powder blue with a cobalt lining. You see, all of our cast offs from America and Europe make it to the reed and palm branch central markets of African Towns – Homoine is now exception. I regularly see trucks coming in with BALES of clothes saying donated from the people of Canada, or Japan or the USA. It’s very interesting being on the other side of things, and being able to read English as well. SO the shirt was this Che Guevara shirt that you can find everywhere in the world from the streets of Camden Town to well the streets of Homoine Town. I just liked the color and it looked new (ish) so I thought since all of my clothes are taking a beating in Nature’s Laundromat, I’d buy it. I walked in with a friend of mine and looked at it. Picked it up and he said hey wait Ian, something’s wrong with the shirt. It said Gay Chevara and well, it looked like a Latino Tinky Winky was on the front. I nearly died laughing in the store. My friend, Admiro, is an English Teacher so he could read the shirt. I couldn’t buy it in front of him because well, it’s just too complicated to explain to him. Even though I did have a conversation with him about AIDS and how it first showed up in Gay men in the States. Well, one thing led to another and I found out he has no problem with homosexuality as long as they don’t hit on him. At least he admits it exists! Anyway, back to the shirt, I’m buying it in the morning and going to wear it for Halloween. I don’t care what all of you think, it makes me laugh and after these past two weeks, that’s exactly what I need to do!

PS. I met this stoner of a retiree at the beach last weekend and he paid for everything for me because he really respects and admires Peace Corps Volunteers. Then he proceeds to tell me, back in the 1980’s when everyone thought Peace Corps was going to be nixed by Regan, there were a couple sayings about us. PCVs from Latin America come back political and enraged. PCVs from Asia come back Buddha and PCVs from Africa come back laughing. Any comments?? Let me just say that statement made me laugh soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo hard – so I guess it’s correct.

When is cultural sensitivity bad for you?

Since I was 16 years old I’ve been doing things with my life that centers on being sensitive and understanding to other people. First it was YFU, the Friend’s World Program and now the Peace Corps here in Mozambique. Something happened to me today the 17^th of October, a day after my 25^th birthday that really hit me hard. Recently I had a falling out with the first person I met here in Mozambique. He and I just didn’t get along very well anymore so we have been respectively keeping our distances. I heard though that he had been sick. A friend of his from the states had sent me some photos for him that I dropped off maybe about a month ago. My friend here at site had just had a bad case of Malaria and was in bed. So I stopped by and gave him the pictures. He didn’t look to good, but no one really does when you get malaria. It’s all too common here in my town, but if you treat it, take care of yourself and rest, you will get over it. Anyway, last time I was in Maputo, I had got a phone call from a mutual friend that said he had been to visit Matos and he was coughing up blood. Uh oh I thought…it’s either TB or HIV. I had wanted to come and just take him straight to the hospital and get those two tests done. Unfortunately, I hadn’t been able to. Here in Africa, if you have white skin, most often you get to jump the line of sick and dying to get your tests done. When I had malaria and had to do some controls, I never had to wait longer than 15 minutes for the test to be done and results given back to me. A Mozambican can wait all day for that. When I finally got around visiting him I quickly realized we wouldn’t be going anywhere. Matos could barely keep his eyes open to see that I had come to visit. I just thought it all looked like HIV. I’m by no means an AIDS expert but I’ve seen so much of it in the past two years that you’d have to be blind ( or culturally blind) not to see it. This man had been a porker and now ways less than me, is covered in lesions, his lips are swollen, dried and cracked, his entire body hurts (malaria residue) and he can’t even sit up. His cousin did say to me though that my coming was good because he had sat up for 5 minutes and taken a bit of yoghurt. I’M really having trouble writing this to you guys, the fact I’m listening to RENT as I write this probably isn’t good, but I need to get it out. Matos’ family had brought him to the hospital, they won’t tell anyone what the hospital said, and obviously weren’t happy with what the hospital had to say because Matos is back at home now. He’s a shrunken talking skeleton of his former self and they are trying to get the witch doctor to cure him because they believe he’s been bewitched or cursed by someone. The person was himself because he couldn’t stop himself from sleeping around. The man is obviously in pain and yet his family will not let him take the drugs that could at least give him some relief of the pain even if he will not live. WHY IS THIS FUCKING STIGMA THERE THAT HIV/AIDS ONLY HAPPENS TO OTHERS!!!! IT DOESN’T JUST HAPPEN TO SOMEONE FAR AWAY!! People, we’ve got to talk about this disease, realize it’s not going anywhere fast and then beat the shit out of it. Please…..

Unfortunately I heard this morning that my friend did indeed die. He was 27 and left behind a wife who most likely is positive now...

Dear God, are you listening? It’s me Ian.

Sometimes I wonder if he is listening but other times I am certain of it. Right now I am praying hard that I get my money from the embassy. It’s just absurd how long it is taking. I got approved for this grant July 31^st. I remember because I thought, oh god I only have a month to put this thing together, because the original date was the first of September. Well that’s past. Now I’ve just got to get this stuff before it is time to go down. I also found out tonight that my school is having problems with its boarding house and they’ve been told to vacate the grounds, which includes my house, by the end of the month. I hope I hope I hope that doesn’t include me! I would just say screw it and ask for an earlier ticket home. We’ll see what happens. I just hope it doesn’t get too complicated. What the heck am I saying, this is Africa, and everything is complicated!

My larium dreams have been getting very weird recently. I’ve started killing people in them. Up until now I’ve only killed people once in the course of two years. Twice I got into accidents but the killing sequence was so comical I was a little confused about where that came from and not worrying about anything in the actual dream. The last two freaked me out though. It’s nice of Uncle Sam to be putting me on a psychedelic drug for two years free of charge. I like it so much I even signed up for a third year. Time to get back to my last two dreams, one of which was in Connecticut the other on the beach here in Mozambique. I was in the house of a friend of my father’s who I’ve known for my entire life. She was upstairs and I think I was waiting for a ride or something. I was sitting down to an episode of LOST that suddenly became real. The Others came into the house looking for my dad’s friend because she apparently had the key to get off the island (but we were obviously in Norwalk, as I said drugs) The people really wanted to hurt my friend so I calmly asked them to go back outside and ask for permission to come into the house first – which they did like good little larium villains. I managed to procure a snake and a machete which then both helped me kill these people. There was no blood involved but the struggle was a bit disturbing because I could physically feel them fighting back against me. After some time I woke up in a sweat with a huge headache and hurting where one of the guys had managed to punch me in the stomach. Carol had come back downstairs to see what was going on and told me that my training had proven well taught and I would make the entire council proud. I have no clue where any of this came from and a little upset by the weirdness that came with it. My second dream had to do with some of my stuff getting stolen on the beach. I had lost a capulana from Swaziland and my nalgene bottle that was sent by my dad from home. Anyway, I had caught the people in my dream, apparently I don’t think Mozambican thieves are that smart – as a matter of fact they aren’t. There is a cliff at the beach where I go with a monument left over from the socialist era here. It’s the site where the Portuguese Police would throw slaves and convicts off the cliff into a ravine with lots of rocks and sharp edges where the waves would come in and basically beat the bodies to death. The monument that’s there is a triangle with a triumphant fist breaking through chains (of slavery I think.) Well, I decided to throw the thieves off the cliff. Sharks then came and ate their bodies. I remember thinking how long the bones would last before they would wash away or would I be caught. Then I woke up.

Oh the heat of it all

So I just wiped my brow and realized summer is back! It took its sweet time coming here too. It was 35 degrees today. That is 95 degrees F. That was the temperature in the shade. Everyone is feeling it today though because yesterday it was 18 degrees Celsius. So it jumped almost 20 degrees in the course of 24 hours. Last night was the first night I had to use my fan and today is the first day that I haven’t heated my water to take a bucket bath. You notice these kinds of things coming back. We are right in the middle of our spate of 4 holidays in the course of three weeks. So school has been pointless. First we had Victory Day, September 7^th, the day Mozambique became victorious of the Portuguese imperialists, then 25^th of September, or the day the war of independence started. The 29^th of September is not an official holiday but everyone takes it off because it is Mozambican armed forces day and then this Thursday we have Dia da Paz. It’s the day that the warring factions signed the peace accords in Rome to end the 16 year civil war. Next week is the week of final exams and then the week after that is grading week. Yes it takes a week to do the grades! After that though, there is no school. No I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself for all that time off. I think I’m going to go to the beach and hell maybe I’ll travel because I am so ready to be done with teaching. 15 year old students are obnoxious the world over. I can only give the utmost respect to teachers who actually like teaching that grade.

On a side note, and a more positive one, this week is pretty big in my life too. Over the course of 2 days there are some pretty big events happening. October 3^rd, my little nephew who doesn’t know me is turning two. He’ll get to know me in time I hope. That same day is 17 years of German unification and I got an invitation to the embassy party in Maputo with a German friend of mine. She’s registered there at the embassy and got an invite that said plus one. So I am the plus one because she thought I would enjoy it the most. Danke Helen. I’m busy listening to a lot of German music and reading a book in German so I don’t completely embarrass myself when I get there and say I can speak German. There is nothing worse when you start speaking a language and then the native speaker says “let’s speak in English, it’ll be easier.” Doh! October 5^th is the 17 year Anniversary of my mom’s death. I can’t believe how fast time goes by. It’s just scary looking at the numbers and realizing that she’s been dead ten years longer than I ever knew her. Yet somehow I don’t ever think of that fact. I’ll be in Maputo on the actually anniversary so hopefully won’t be too lonely.

My theatre competition is coming up fast. I hope things go well. That’s part of the reason why I am going down to Maputo again. 2 times is one month is a bit much! The money from the embassy for the project are a little late in coming though. I hope by the time I actually post this message my bank account will be bursting with Meticais. Along the lines of theatre, I met my future Mozambican partner is crime for next year. She’s a dance teacher that lives in Maxixe and has an arts group started. She wants to get things bigger though and include acting lessons. So, we are going to work together and hopefully set up some sort of Maxixe Theatre Performing Arts Company. I just think it is funny how I’ve skipped over my own career in acting and gone straight into teaching it. Aren’t you only supposed to get to this stage when you get tired of going to the cattle calls or have been stuck auditioning for ten years and not actually working?

Please wait 90 days for delivery of package.

When I was a kid sending away for stuff in magazines or whatever, that 90 day processing period seemed like an eternity. Now, it’s all I have left in my original contract with the Peace Corps. It’s going to be an interesting 90 days though. As I write this, I’m sending off paperwork to the Embassy for the grand total of 85,000 Meticais. If it were the old money, it would have been 85 million. I wonder if I will ever see sums that high in a currency that doesn’t look and feel like monopoly money. That remains to be seen. Today is also a pretty big day in Homoine. I helped get together a music workshop under the name of Positivo Moçambique. It just kind of fell in my lap – but that’s how all the good things happen isn’t it? A trio of musicians from Inhambane City, a Brit, an Austrian and a Mozambican, are coming to do a performance and a workshop about HIV/AIDS. (As Marc said the other night, that’s all I seem to be doing, but in Africa, it’s a big problem!) The workshop will happen over 2 days. On the first day we all get together for a concert. The concert will be about what the students choose. But the doctor in town has asked me to incorporate condom use. That’s her biggest frustration here because no one seems to be using condoms. It goes against the Abstinence and Be Faithful mantra of the Bush administration though. The concert will only go for about an hour. The main part of the workshop is tomorrow at my school. About 30 of the students will get together with the musicians and come up with lyrics and music under the AIDS theme. The whole goal of Positivo Moçambique is to create an AIDS awareness message on the “grassroots” level because apparently it’s been proven that when the community comes up with the message, they’ll actually pay attention to it instead of just smiling and nodding like they were being preached at. Also, Mozambicans are very musical people, they are always singing. Even after two years here, I’m still amazed how much rhythm they all have. I guess when you don’t have access to the instruments, you make do with what you have – your body. The end product should be a lot of fun. We are going to record the song which will eventually be put into a compilation disc that will include all of the songs that the various communities have written where PM has gone. We are the 3rd song, so it’s got a way to go before the disc is full. Some Austrians will also be on hand to film this for the magical donors from abroad. I’ll let you know how it goes afterwards.

School is coming to a close very quickly, which I could not be more excited about. There are only 5 weeks left in the term. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE TEACHING. I just realized that 60 plus kids in a class is too much. Just yesterday, I was reviewing the vocab of the day and came across a student whom I didn’t know the name of and hardly remember being in my class. These are students that I have been with for two years now. I would also like desks, a door, and electricity in my classroom when I continue teaching. Not too much to ask for huh? I also found out recently that I am a better teacher in smaller groups, at a higher level than high school or at the level of an Elementary School Stateside. It’s such a good feeling to finally know what you want and what you are good at. Now just if one of these things could turn itself into a career for me.

Next week is what’s called our COS conference. We’re having it in this place called Bilene. It’s a small town on a lagoon and I just can’t believe that “time is over” already. But, as many of you know, I’ve extended for a third year of service. I just don’t feel that I have given all I can or gotten all I can. I’m not sure which. I’m going to be moving to the big city on the coast and working in a youth organization. But I’ll be in the States for a month before all of this starts. So please wait 90 days (from today) for the delivery.

Ian

Drip drip drip drip

Hey all!

My title of this post is an interesting part of the saga of these ramblings that all of you have so patiently read over the past couple years. At least I hope that you have patiently read. Let me first say that I heard tonight from my dad that Mag’s back surgery went well. She went in today and so far so good. I was out with two of my friends and saw a call coming through from America on my cell phone. My heart naturally did a flying leap into my throat. I didn’t know who was calling but I knew it was someone to call me about Mag. I answered the phone saying, “Please God, tell me you have good news and not bad news.” Well, not to bore you, IT WAS GOOD NEWS. My mood changed so much after that phone call. Thank you Dad and thank you Mag for being just as amazing as you always have been. I don’t know if Mag reads this though. Noel or Jess you should tell her to sign into this and read this post. J
Week one of my final trimester as a Mozambican teacher has finally started – and it was a real cutting start to the term, literally. My school director, in his infinite wisdom, decided the most pressing problem that his school has was the length of his female students hair and the decorations they put in it. All this week he was prowling around the school ground with some of the most menacing scissors I’ve ever seen. He was honestly going around to the classes pulling girls out of their studies cutting anything longer than 10 centimeters and any hair that had any sort of ornaments in it. Remember that I work at a school that has no running water, electricity when the gods wish, and half of the classrooms are made of river reeds. Wouldn’t you think there are more pressing matters for him to take care of before the length of female hair? But naturally a girl student with long hair is a distraction to her fellow students learning. Yeah right! Like that’s the only thing distracted the students, let’s ignore the random goats and chickens that walk into my class on an almost daily basis. In my ongoing relationship of mutual understanding with the old monkey, I noticed two of the girls in my class had “unsatisfactory” hair lengths and one had beads braided into her hair. I excused them for the rest of the day with a homework assignment to get their hair redone and write a composition about it to read to class the next day. Hey I’ll do anything for my old monkey.
On the personal side of life, the mulungo population of Homoine is blossoming. Right now there are 8 foreigners living in my town – considering I was one of two when I got here, that’s a big jump. There are two Brazilians and a Dutchwoman that I’ve gotten close to in the past few weeks. The Brazilians have sine brought in some Austrian friends of theirs who have a music workshop touring the country right now. They came to Homoine to meet with me because they heard about my interest in performing and now we are doing a 2 day music workshop against AIDS. Hopefully we’ll get television coverage in Germany, Mozambique, England and Austria. Hey if the UN ever needs another place to work Homoine is just the place! Day one of the workshop will be a show that these musicians do for the town and day two will be an artistic workshop where the students will write the lyrics and the music to a song which will be recorded and hopefully distributed in Africa and Europe! Now I have been signed on as a “helper bee” because I apparently speak “damn good Portuguese.” The best part of this meeting for me was the fact that I was talking with the coordinators of POSITIVO MOCAMBIQUE about my theatre project and they said since I will be staying one more year ( I hope) they would be more than happy to incorporate my project into theirs since music and theatre go together so well. Let’s see what happens. This is what the title means to me. I have been “struggling” here trying to get projects going and all of a sudden in my last four months of service everything is falling into place. Does anyone believe in fate? All these amazing opportunities have been falling in my lap and I’ll be damned if I don’t take them. With a bit of luck the boa sorte will start with my placement in the city next year!
I’m off to a timbila festival in the south of my province tomorrow. The timbila is a local wooden xylophone, kinda like the marimba of Latin America. Apparently it is THE festival in southern Mozambique. I’ll be sure to take lots of pictures and put them up soon. Hey everyone put pressure on my brother to put my pictures that I sent him up on the internet!

More soon

This is why I love Africa!

So people, sorry for being in absentia for so long but I've got a problem. I don't think life is very unusual so I don't think it would be to interesting to you all. But it most likely will be. Anyway I want to tell you what happened to me today.
This morning I was in Xaixai at my friend's house going for a chapa down to the capital Maputo. I got one that left right away, I filled the last seat which was the front seat next to the driver. It's a very comfy seat to have especially for someone as tall as me. No one ended up sitting next to me the entire 3 hour journey down to the capital. When we got to the entrance of the city, we turned onto the airport road instead of going to the bus terminal. Little confusing but occasionally that happens because of the chapa not having the correct papers to be i n the capital or the car being newly stolen from South Africa. Hey it happens!!!! I was chatting with the driver having put all my ride gear safely away so I could pay attention and he asked me where I worked. I told him the address of the Peace Corps Office and he drove me to the DOOR!!!! Not only did he drive me to the door. He gave me back the 120 meticais fare because he said I was nice.

So i get to the office and two packages from the states are waiting for me. Things I had given up for lost but they got here. Thank you Dad and thank you Rhettsky. But the most interesting thing was a notice in my box telling me about the new Bagel shop in Maputo. Yup you read that right A BAGEL SHOP!!!! Luckily its only a 10 minute walk from the office so I ran up there. I got a lox, cream cheese bagel and some amazing coffee. Then when I asked for the bill, which should have been 125 mets (my bus fare) I got one for 85 mets. Volunteer discount because the owners were PCVs in Cape Verde and Cameroon! Then I get back to the office and have a talk with the boss who gave me the paper work for the extension! They all agree with it and now I just have to go through all the lovely official motions. :) Now I'm off to Boane for the first time since training. Going to see my mozambican host family for the first time since training as well.

More soon

Ian

What a beautiful day in Africa!

Yesterday and today have been some weird yet absolutely wonderful days. Yesterday, I went to a friends house to watch a James Bond. DVDs are super cheap on the streets of Maputo and I'm addicted to James Bond. I've currently gotten him addicted to James Bond as well, but that is okay because life is all about experiencing new things. We then cooked some cow in my version of what an American steak would be. All in all it was a good night. My town's American population is going to double soon beacause a previous volunteer is coming to visit. I'll report on that after the fact.

Today on the way down to the city, I got into a taxi and got a call from my friend. He hung up and I thought he was trying to call me. Most volunteers have many Mozambican friends who do that because of the prevailing thought that we are made of money. Anyway, he was sitting 3 rows behind me and calling me mulungo. So I retorted with the usual mulande and got the whole car laughing. On the ride down, because I was sitting by the door, I had to get in and out of the taxi many times. EVERY SINGLE TIME I got out I pulled part of the car with me. I didn't break anything, these cars just come apart like that because they are put together of various pieces from various cars at various times. THIS IS AFRICA! But at least the car was laughing. I got down and had a wonderful ride across the water to come to the city and will now go to the beach to relax. I need it after dismantling this poor guys car.

More soon

I've been upstaged

So I just had a conversation with my father last night about how I am getting so used to my time in town. Things are just comfortable. If I don't show up at the local bar just even to do my work and watch the BBC world service, the ladies who run it are very worried about me. It gets interesting though because no matter how comfy I feel in town, it is still a fact that I am a foreignor. That is part of what has been bugging me of late. I feel finally that I have good friends here in town but I am still looked at as a dollar sign for them. I don't understand why. I mean I look at them and think how lucky THEY are to have their family and friends around. They look at me and think how lucky I am to have my iPod around. As much as I love Liza Minnelli (that's for you Ed and Marc) she can get old after a while.

A friend of mine came over recently and I was listening to my iPod. He surprised me, so I didn't have time to put my iPod away. Now his phone cost 10,000 Meticais... he told me that. Anyway, he wouldn't believe me that my iPod costs 7,000, even here in Maputo. What I have or touch turns to gold, and let me tell you, THAT GETS OLD!!! To think I wanted to be famous one day. Now that I am, god please make it go. :O)

Back to the title of this blog. I was not the best show in town this morning on my walk to school. I have to walk through a cow pasture, that's lined with palm trees but still a cow pasture, to get to my school. Well, the temp has done down so it is mating season. I say I wasn't the best show in town until I flinched at a bull jumping in my direction. I understood what was said about me in Xitswa and responded in Xitswa. Needless to say, I became the hit again. We'll see what happens next week though when the commander in chief of Mozambique comes riding in on a helicopter, yes, a helicopter to town.

You'll see pictures soon.

Ian

The visit of a....

So, sorry about being missing in action for so long. But please rest assured that it doesn't mean nothing has been happening. IT HAS!!!! I've just gotten so used to what is going on around me that I don't think anyone will be interested in it anymore. But I do want to tell you about a couple of things before I go have lunch.

My Larium dreams have been getting so crazy recently. I'm not complaining because they aren't bad they are just getting CRAZY. The most recent ones have had to do with heads of state or future ones for that matter. The most recent one I just had last night. I was moderating some sort of debate between Hillary and Barrack Obama. I don't remember what was being said (yet) but HIllary said something and all of a sudden I shouted "YOU'VE GOT MY VOTE!" Folks come on I think its time America has a different person than a white rich male in power. The other dream was a couple of weeks back. I was back in London with a friend of mine at the Banqueting Hall behind Buckingham Palace. (We were there for real back in 2003, for a party I won tickets to for Jerry Springer's Opera) Anyway, the queen all of a sudden comes in and comes straight to me and asks me to dance. We danced the night away. Just as I was about to leave, she asked me to stop and listen to something she wrote for me. So she played me a song jumping around the room... on her banjo. I know I'm weird but you guys read this blog to hear about strange and unusual things no?

Which brings me to the last bit of news. My town is in a frenzy right now because the president of the country is coming to visit. We are getting a face lift and a paint job. The potholes are getting filled in, the road is being resanded and the flags and bunting are being brought out. But I want to ask you all, what good will it do if the president comes to visit and he sees a Disneyland version of my town?

I won't complain about the waterworks being fixed though

Ian

Found something interesting

Back in Maputo for a weekend of Peace Corps meetings. But, I just wanted to through some things out here on my blog as I watch "Snakes and Lizards"beamed over from Brazil. All of you should check out this website www.malhanga.com/rufino/index.html It has amazing pictures of Maputo and www.malhanga.com has present day pictures of the city too. The website is in portuguese and english but its pretty self explanitory. I hope you enjoy it all and I hope it entices you all to come visit.

Ian

Drip Drip....Drip Drip

I originally planned this title to talk about the oppressive heat we've been having over the past couple of days but then I realized it could be a reference to a whole bunch of things. Let's talk about the heat first. Many of you guys may have heard about the Cyclone (read hurricane) Favio that roared through here about 10 days ago. It was very interesting. Luckily I was not in the direct path of his sweaty fury. It was 200 kilometers north of me that really got hit bad. I feel bad because in the resort town of Vilankulo, the World Bank just built a municipal market ground and a brand spanking new secondary school - both of which got leveled. It was an initiative to extend education and business in the area. That is the first drip drip.......drip drip. Development work moves along at that pace but when you finally get it moving, well you know. Favio came through and we were put on stand ready. I had to pack a bag and be ready to go. But we didn't have to go and I have very happy.

Last September, I built a gutter on the building in front of me. I wanted it to catch the rain water so I didn't have to get ladies to go to the river for water. I've got a holding tank that is roughly 340 liters of water. Thanks to Favio I didn't have to get water for 10 days! Let me tell you 20 liters of water hurts on the head. That is the second drip drip... drip dip.

Now, I've finally gotten my secondary projects going. Two nights a week, I have a group of kids in the community come and we play and learn English in a less foreboding atmosphere than school. Four nights a week, I have the adults coming to learn English where they don't feel that the students are kicking them down because they can't speak English. I'm getting my mural club started up again from last year that floundered after my operation. Finally I am starting a theatre comp for the province of Inhambane. that is the third and final drip drip.. drip drip....

I finally feel like I am getting started here in Africa and I only have 9 months left.

More soon

Two months MIA

SO First off just want to apologize for slacking on the writing. But I think I've been busy. I'm teaching five classes of 9th grade English at the secondary school this year. 3 of my classes are taught under trees. The school exploded by about 2000 students this year. The roads are getting better so I think more and more people can come in from the countryside to my town to get to the school. We have almost 5000 students spread over three shifts. There is some group of people in the school from 6 am to 10 pm 5 days a week. So its a pretty busy place. They are building new rooms for the school but we shall see when they are finished.

Anyway, I want to tell you guys that I just found out about the flooding in Mozambique today. I saw it on the BBC website and thought. Hmmm, I live here and have not heard about it on the news yet. But its happening in a province called Zambezia which is where the Zambezi river drains out into the ocean. But north of the River Save, which is my province's northern border, it may as well be another country. But, all of us are safe. Even the volunteers up north are doing okay.

I'm putting some more photos from South Africa and vacation up on the internet. i'll send out the link and I hope you guys enjoy. KPlease feel free to make any comments. Before I post this though I want to tell you guys what happened last night. My friend Michael came up from Xai Xai to hang out before school started for him. He works at a Teacher Training School so starts later than us in the public school system. Anyway, we went out in town last night with some of my teacher friends. As per usual, a dance party gets started in the road after dark. Its what Mozambicans like to do. :O) But the Headmistress of the boarding school was out as well. She and I had been fighting but last night I asked her to dance in Xitswa and now things are behind us. She couldn't even remember what we were fighting about. I can but I didn't say. Trying to be diplomatic. I was just shocked about how music was able to make us friendly again.

Til next time

Ian

Kurinzela

Kurinzela is the newest edition to the Hefele household of Homoine in Inhambane Province, Mozambique. She is about 6 months old I would guess and such a little bundle of energy. I feel a little bit awkward that I have gotten a dog while my first little one is not even in the ground a month, but Africa operates on a different plane of existence. A colleague of mine brought her over the other day, after I spent some recoup time at the beach and burned myself for the first time in YEARS. She looks like a jack Russell terrier. Man, can she JUMP! That's why I'm thinking that she has some jack in her. My housekeeper is taking care of her right now and she and I had a long talk about "Kuri" coming into the household. I think I've achieved one of my goals in PC Moz because it was a Mozambican who brought me the dog. They realised how important Timisela was to me and realised that yes a dog can be part of the family too.

So now, I have a mountain of more little goals to get through and my PCV existence will be complete.

Ianito

PS. I put up Xmas lights the other day and shaped them as a Christmas tree. I'm very excited because I'll be at a family party of a good friend of mine. Kuri will be good company too.

RIP Timisela

So, my transition period to minha terra africana has been rough. But last weekend my dog got stolen from my yard. She was tied up for the night, just felt it was necessary. I tied her up loosely and in the morning she wasn't there. I didn't get too concerned because she had always gone through town before and always come back. I thought she must have just escaped. But anyway, I put the word out for people to keep looking for her. Tuesday morning of this week, I was sitting down to my cup of tea in the morning and got a beep from some one who had been on the look out for Timisela. She was found in the crossroads of the market behind the electricity building. Her throat was slit. she had been there for a couple of days I think because of the body was rigid. Anyway, i lost it. But people stepped out of the gawking crowd to help. Someone ran for a shovel. Others got some rope and a stick of bamboo to carry her back to my house. I was walking through my town crying my eyes out. But people were considerate and the woman that works at my house was AMAZING. They all worked together and got timisela burried in the field near my out house where she loved to play. She was a beautiful dog and will be remembered by this lonely PCV. But, if I get another dog, I have thought of another name. Kurinzela

HOPE

I'm feeling HOT HOT HOT

Back in Moz for a couple of days now and it is HOT HOT HOT. But that is most definitely how I like it. When I got back to my house, Julia was home but just went out to the market. Her sons were in the yard and so I went in. I was in my bedroom un packing when she came back into the yard. I was able to surprise her and she dropped the groceries and was REALLY happy to see me. Everyone was really happy to see me. I'm glad that I have this scar on my neck so I can actually get to show some physical evidence to people. Let me tell you my POrtuguese has expanded, really fast and turned really medical! :O) But since most things medical come from latin, its quite easy. Add an o, a or e and you've got portuguese. Thyroid is tyroide. Or at least that is how they pronounce it.

It is amazing though how some people don't change in there habbits. My school director is just as annoying and self righteous as ever. But now I've got a little more leverage because he sees and knows that I went home and came back BECAUSE I WANTED TO and like my site. One of my students also just sent a text saying he is really happy that I am back. It brought tears to my eyes. and made me realise why I am here.

Ian

back in Africa

Hello all

So this is the first post in a while I know. I have to apologize but most of you know what was wrong anyway. But after a long two day trip, I've made it back to Mozambique. I was so giddy on the plane today as I landed. Good thing I don't look suspicious. :O) But it was almost as if everything was suppossed to work out this way. As the plane was landing in Maputo, at the airport that anywhere else would be called an airstrip, it suddenly banked over the rest of the city and brought me over the Maputo Bay so I could get a good view of the skyline. After that we landed and I had a huge grin on my face. I'm so grateful I got to see all that I did get to see and for those I didn't I'll be seeing you soon. But hopefully that just means you will come and visit.

Tchau
Ianito in Maputo

An update

So, the shirt is exhibit A, the onion newspaper is exhibit B and the guy is going on trial tomorrow. I don't know what is going to happen. I was not told to show up there. I personally don't want to see that guy again but was told I can go recover exhibit A tomorrow afternoon.
I'll send you all another update soon

Ian

Peace Corps Believe it or NOT

First, let me tell you sorry about not posting in a long time but people who come visit me that my internet connection is a giraffe, elephant and african lady's head ride away from my house... no not really but let me tell you...Let me tell you what happened last weekend. It comes in the files of Believe it or not. I was walking around the big city in the area doing some errandswhen I decided to pass by the post office to check our mailbox. 5 volunteers in the area decided to share a box so it would come out as cheaper. Anyway, Jess has been texting me that a tee shirt and yankees hat were coming but I kept checking and it never came. So I'm walking by the p.o. and the guy working at the post office was wearing a pic of jess and felix on the tee shirt I was suppossed to be wearing. I didn't know what to do. First of all, I was alone, my portuguese doesn't stand up to emotion very well and I just didn't want to over react and kill him. So i called him over to where i was standing and let him have it. He said, the bastard, that he bought the shirt in the market! Jess could be making a mint if she can sell images of her son in african markets! So I told him to take me there but I was nervous that he was leading me into an ambush. So I ran into someone in the road I knew and she came with me. The woman who sold him the shirt in the market didn't show up that day, it was sunday. I said of course she didn't "bloody" show up, she lives in brooklyn!!!! Ooo I was so steamed. What was hysterical was two of my friends had been saying for a few months, we're not getting anything I think this guy is stealing. I thought they were crazy just because of time it takes to get from the USA to MOZ and the distance. But then I saw my damn nephew on a middle aged african's chest. The next day I went to the police with Peace Corps and with a collegue of mine who knows the story. We got a search warrent and searched his house. He has two (ish) one looks like a bombed out shell from Germany in WOrld war two. Found a recent national geographic but there was no address on it. At his house in the woods we found copies of the new york times, daily news, books in german and spanish, and the onion newspaper. Needless to say we got him. I didn't get anything but the tee shirt back but I think I'm only missing that package. But he gave me an amazing story that I will have for the rest of my life. ALso, my "greatest acheivement in Peace Corps" I threw a Mozambican in jail! you all who told me once that you were going to send something. Did you send it? I just want to keep track of what is coming my way. Unnfortunately there can be no surprises. But at least we got the guy so packages will be coming through again. Also, include a list in the package about what is in there. Let me give you my friend monique's address. I'm meeting her in South Africa in December and she has agreed to bring anything there from my family. Get it from my brother, my sister or my dad. They will have.

Now, I am off to write the first episode of CSI Mozambique

Ianito

The magical whitey of Homoine

So, being the only white person in a small town in the Peace Corps has some advantages. The locals really look out for you, they take care of your dog, they teach you Portuguese and Xitswa... you get the idea. But, they also come running when a family member is sick. This happened the other day when I was sitting on a mat in my yard correcting papers. My maid's son came running in asking me to come with him because his little brother was sick. My maid's family lived out in what is called the caniço or reed part of town. Its where the Mozambicans were usually forced to live by the Portuguese colonisers. Anyway, I grab some ibuprofen from my drawer and head out. When I get to the house, my maid is cradeling here son and crying cause he is burning up and REALLY sick. This is last Sunday, so the hospital was avaliable (yes they close on Sundays too) and I could tell from seeing this kid that it was Malaria. I didn't even have to touch him to feel the fever, you could just see the heat and the disease radiating off of this poor little 3 year old. Anyway, I gave some of the ibuprofen to the kid just to make him comfortable so he could sleep. That is really the best thing to do for Malaria besides get the medicines from the hospital. Anyway, my maid insisted I stay for some crab lunch that she had just cooked so she could thank me for coming to help. I stayed, barely able to stand upright in her house the size of my childhood bedroom and ate up. All of a sudden I just started shaking. Not crying or anything but just shaking. I had to stop eating because the fork kept banging against the tin plate and was making me really nervous. so I excused myself.

When I got home I just lost it. WHy? I thought I was roughing because I didn't have running water. Why? Three people live in her house and I have three rooms to myself.

I just don't get it.

Um pedido

Just a quick question for all you out there. I'm looking to outfit my house with the standard peace corps furniture - a hammock. But true to Mozambique fashion, I can't find one in this tropical country! :O) So, anyone that is in EMS or some store like that, can you price a light weight hammock for me so Monique can bring it for me in December, or if you want to use it as packing in a next package.

More soon
Ian

Viva Mocambique e Corpo da Paz

So this morning I have had a complete trip out. First it is the 4th of July... FELIZ DIA DA INDEPENDENCIA! Yes I am still in Maputo, things take longer to heal in the tropics. But I am slowly going crazy down here. It should be a day in the life. That may be what I change this blog too. Let me catch all of you up with what is going on here. Anyway, I am a Peace Corps Volunteer but am a millionare (YEAH BABY) but in the currency called meticais. There are now two currencies in the country (technically, in actuality there are four) and it goes as follows. The money that was here when I came was called METICAL or MZM and the exchange rate was 26,500 to the american dollar. Now we have NOVO METICAL or MTn and it is 26.50 to the dollar. So basically they just loped some zeros off. But I think it is all a big lie because all the banks are down, they have been since the first, and no one has seen more than a fleeting glance of these new bills. No idea how long the banks will be down until but hey the answer to all questions in this country is

ITS MOZAMBIQUE! :O)

So, going on I turn on the TV today and see the face of this kid called Robin Dejesus in this movie called CAMP. NOw I just never had the desire to see it because of many reasons, not the LEAST of me being bitter because I remember him as that little eighth grader who's first show EVER was a summer stock performance of Grease and now I am seeing him on a South African network in Mozambique. Little weird, besides the fact that I gave the kid rides home to Roodner Court area of Norwalk many times. Great singer but the acting, blame the script Ian blame the script... I made my friend Rhett watch it with me and needless to say she wasn't too impressed. Anyway, our friend Kelly comes into the room saying she say a really cool staff member of PC Mozambique and we bolt out of the room. Once we get out into the street, we see her in the car stopped at a light and we are in a really n ice area of town so she didn't have her car doors locked. It was hysterical because the three of us just pile right into her car and say we are kidnapping you. Who was driving??? But it's Mozambique. So we had some coffee and caught up. But she made us realise how cool what we are doing really is. She just came back form the States and was telling us how much respect she had gotten when she told people she works for Peace Corps. She speaks perfect English and sounds British (lived there for two years) so no one believes she is Moz.

Another friend of mine just got back to the States after finishing up her time here. She was coming back into the states with her dog and the customs official was an RPCV and let her right through. I love this place

Ianinho

Things that make you go WHAT THE!?!?!?!?!?!?!

So many of you I'm sure have been watching the football/soccer world cup on television. Or if you are in Germany in person. But anyway, a few nights ago Portugal trounced the other team in the quearter finals of the FIFA world cup. I just left the movie theatre here in Maputo and the city was in chaos. Horns were going off, lights were flashing, people were leaning out of there high rise apartment windows, there were cries of VIVA PORTUGAL punctuated by the chants of COLONIALISTA...COLONIALISTA from some drunk Mozambicans that just came out of the bar across the street. My question is, Portugal seriously messed up this country, largely within living history, yet the language ties are so strong that Mozambicans will root for them in the world cup?

HUH?!?!?!?!

Now if Portugal wins.....uh oh

We shall see if this works

Howdy ya'll,

Howzit? I've been MIA for awhile but as they say, no news is good news or it just means I am damn lazy. But anyway, things are great. I'm down in Maputo right now on some Peace Corps business. I'm planning a boys leadership conference with some other PCVs from older groups. I think I'm basically there so they can pass the torch to someone for next year's conference when none of them will be here. I heard a crack in my mouth while I've been down here so I made a dentist appointment to just to make sure everything is okay. Keep your fingers crossed.

Quick announcement, my friend Monique is coming in about 5 months for a month long visit. I'm going to be meeting her in South Africa and we are travelling around SA and MOZ together for my summer break, which includes christmas and new years!!! Anyway, she is more than happy to bring stuff from all of you for me. I don't want to put her contact info up here but just email me and I will send you her address. REmember even packets of kool aid make me happy. She lives in New York so it should be easy for ya'll to get stuff to her.

So the title of this entry is in reference to trying to put up a video I made to either this website or my kodak online gallery. I think what may be happening is that I copy a bunch of stuff to a disk and send it to noel. We will see, "but, in Africa there is always time" and I hope you guys have all been enjoying what you have been seeing. Remember, visits are always welcome and I will pick you up anywhere in South Africa or Mozambique.

Where to begin... this past trimestre at work has been interesting. I've certainly seen a broad spectrum of Mozambican life that has shocked me and endeared me to the crazy life of being caucasian in Africa. My students "por fim" are finally used to me and I have been stopped on random occaisions about how some of my students really like my English class and look forward to it during the school day. Let me give you a mental image which I think you will find funny. The standard Mozambican way of teaching is very rote learning. The teacher usually stands by the board droning oout facts, writing it on the board and the students copy it into their notebooks. I, on the other hand am jummping around the room, standing on desks, crawling o n the floor, and running through the students... all to illustrate English vocabulary, now there is passion for your work...and I'm doing this is Portuguese.

Moving on, last month PC MOZ said goodbye to a group of volunteers that came in 2004. I got really close to one who lived in my local big city. So, I decided to come down with that friend to help say goodbye. That was my last blog I think. So anyway, the Peace Corps "godfather" hooked up a car rental for some visiting friends. Well, this car was pimped out. There was a sun roof!!!! But, it died about half way down the EN1 to Maputo. We then don't know how to get to Maputo, it is getting dark and we NEED to get Maputo. So I'm running around the town of Xai Xai to get a Chapa to drive us down. To make a long story short, we rent a chapa for 2.000.000 Meticais and get the private phone line of the police chief of the province of Gaza.

But, I am loving life up in Homoine and have outfitted my house to make it look really nice. I did it all from the camping section of the department store!

More later remember send me stuff!

Love ya'll

ian

Oh Maputo

So, here in Maputo after one hell of an African style trip. I'll do that blog when I have a little more time, because, you see I have gotten some pictures put up on the internet! I've actually been able to put about 35 pics up. There are three envelopes of hard copies heading stateside right now. To Mag, Jess and Dad. I know some people who are on there way to Joburg so I gave them the pictures and thinking that from Mozambique the photos have to go through there anyway to get to America so why not cut some of the middle men out. But, I'm going to try to share the picture through kodakgallery. I hope you can all see them and enjoy them. Pictures are going to be a slow process but I promise to keep them coming. Hopefully within the next two years internet connection will improve along with everything else so it will be easier. But I'm doing everything African style now. If you get an invite from Kodakgallery and know some people who want to see pictures who have not gotten an invite from me. PLEASE SHARE!!!!

Ndzi mbongile!

African pulse with a Latin rhythm

That is what Maputo is to me. I love that city and I have a long weekend from work so I am going to go to see my friend Fran off. The first time i went back to that city after being at site for a long time I will have to say this quasi New Yoker and Londoner got overwhelmed. IN my town, seeing three cars on the road is considered heavy traffic and two cars going the opposite directions is a traffic jam. So when I am in Maputo and actually have to look both ways before crossing I sit on the curb and hope someone will come to my rescue and help me across the road! No not really but more often than not a chapa appears out of thin air and I fly accross the road. :O) But in Maputo, the smells hit you full force and it is an overload of diesel fumes, every food under the sun frying up in gallons of cooking oil on the side of the road, the hair product of the ladies walking down the road who are wearing actual designs that could be seen anywhere. Not that I don't like capulanas but Maputo is a wonderful recharge for this little big city boy. Pictures are getting sent out to my sister, my father and Mag so everyone keep a heads up and when I can get my hands on a blank CD i'll burn my digital pics and send them to my brother to post on the internet. HEy Noel. flickr isn't working for me for some reason! :O(

Ianito

so, parte dois

Let me apologise immensely for not responding to any emails. Gmail is not accessible right at that moment. I have no idea why but this is Africa, so I have given up asking for along time now! Anyway, I am going to try and burn a cd of my pictures so far and send them to my brother Noel, who will then upload my pictures I hope. Otherwise, next time I go to Maputo, which is god knows when. :O)

Anyway, life is moving on along here. Last week was a crazy week at school. I broke up two fights in one day. One was between my dog and a turkey that wandered into my yard. The other was between two students that i actually had to battle with. But I felt like a good teacher because my director complimented me for doing the right thing and bringing the students to him! Last Saturday was apparently a student teach meeting and since I am head teacher of a stream of 65 students I was suppossed to meet with the parents. I show up at school on the day of the meeting at 8 AM. Which is the time I was told to be there. Only one other teacher was there and it was an english teacher so we get talking about the course and what we have to do. After, another teacher that only teaches during the night came up. He said he was here because he was put on as a teacher during the day. I laughed because it seemed so very mozambique. Little did I know it was my stream he was put in charge of! Anyway, I ggot booted out because anzdi wulawuli Xitswa kwatsi! :O( Hopefully that will change though. Also, right now I have no electricity at my house, who knows when I will get it back. The handy man had sent some kids up a tree to trim a tree, right over my electricity wires. I knew what was going to happen and it happened JUST AS I WAS TELLING THEM TO BE CAREFUL of my wires! Oh well....

Ya know, it seems like all I do is complain but I'm really liking it here! It's just I'm so used to it I don't think you guys would like to here about how I take a now COLD bucket bath under the stars. Or walk through groves of palm trees under the bluest sky to get to work every day. Or WOuld you? And don't worry, I am writing it all down for the (mis)adventures to come.

Africa is complicated

SO, I finally get the chance to upload some photos and I have to do them one BY ONE!!!!!!!!!! ARGH. But anyway, check out www.kodakgallery.com and have a look. It should be fun and interesting. I hope....

Just a quick update

Hello from the grand capital city of the land of good people. On a map, it just goes by Inhambane City. But its a cool little place and I have been here since Sunday. I'm staying until sunday befor I go to home to Homoine. We are at a Boy's conference now. This afternoon I'm painting murals on the walls around town. It should look good when it is finally finished. Don't know exactly when that will be then. I'm here with three other people from my town. Remember the "Can I have a tee-shirt with that" post? Well, this weekend has most definitely made me believe that even more. Both of my students and teacher want tee shirts of the conference. I'm scared there will mutiny if we don't get some for them so I think they are being made as I type. People where them with pride so maybe I will too.

Second, an last paragraph here. I've become a lot more patriotic since living here. Go ahead smile and laugh. But I didn't say patriotic to what. I'm saying patriotic to freedom of thought and speech and being taught to think for yourself. Something that I have noticed this week while listening to speeches and lectures about "thinking for yourself" and "thinking critically" stuff I have heard from middle school and yet it is all new ideas for my students. I'm going to try posting pictures into my online kodak album tomorrow, so, look here for t he web address.

Tchau

A little old but funny

Hello Everyone, I found this when I was cleaning my house and since I've taken to writting out my blogs, I thought I would post this now that the internet is back. Remember, this is about 3 weeks ago. I was just coming out of malaria and the like.
anyway, here it is.

So, to keep you all up to date, Africa is slowly kicking my ass. I came down with malaria and spent a week in Maputo. I was healthy enough to come home to Homoine but seemed to have left some part of me in Maputo. That tend to be kind of important in this land of giant bugs and killer diseases... it's my immune system. Malaria ravages your insides, turns the inside out and leaves you gasping for air. But I made it through and am resolute to make it better. It is the African flu though and everyone gets it. The flu on steriods. I'm beginning to think the survival of the fittest theory is correct. We whites came from this continent but the heat, bugs and diseases got the best of us so we left! So, we are NOT all powerful and had to leave "the kitche" and we gutted it in the process. But I'm not turning into the bleeding heart, bitching about all the injustices we Europeans have done to our mother continent. They were done, now it is up to my generation to realise what need to be done to rectify it. I'm seeing people work at that every day. African exploration is over. They are seriously going to bite western civilisation on the ass if we don't help them out a bit more. Something I'm definitely learned over the past 6 months, is Africa changes you whetheryou like it or not. I'm sitting here with my improvised swamp-cooler (a wet rag draped over my fan) listening to the BBC crackling through from Bush House in London "directly" to Homoine. And I realise how foreign my life 4 miles north of that transmission house and my life in America now seem. Time in Africa is something that needs to be experienced, it cant be described. Days are longer than weeks and hours are like months yet time marches on to the steady beat of the morter and pestal, the size of a grandfather clock.

Africa also has a wicked sense of humour. My laptop and iPod were collecting dust in my house and now are collecting dust in someone else's house. So, any care packages that may come, through in a couple of CDs. Anykind of music would be great. My address is a few posts back if you guys want it. My family has it too.
So, I've cut my ties from the music (read very important) part of my life and now am ready to listen to Africa in all her sticky, sweet, spicy glory.


(Ok sue me, I think I may have been slightly feverish when I wrote this out!) Hope you enjoyed it.