Feliz dia da gracas

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO YOU ALL!!!!! Sorry I didn't get to post this week, but I will soon. I think about you all and according to my friends here has pictures of all of you too! :O) I will have the info the next time I'm on the web as to where I will be for the next two years! ONE WEEK AND COUNTING!

Give me a call sometime

Ianito

Massinga!\

Okay everybody, keep your fingers crossed. We have 3 weeks left of model school. This is some crazy Peace Corps practice where I get up in front of a "smallish" class of 45. I think after these two years when i get back to the States and really do start teaching (you all can laugh now as I know what you are thinking) I'm not going to know what to do. Ill have a class of 30 and wait five minutes asking where the other half of the class is! :O) But after model school, we will have a big Thanksgiving dinner celebration and figure out where we are going for the next two years. They sent us last week all over the southern Provinces of this country and I went to Inhambane Province to a town called Massinga. IT IS PARADISE. The volunteer lives in a reed hut on school grounds and it is just everything I have thought about Peace Corps and more. Portuguese is only spoken at school and through strangers at the market but this volunteer speaks Matswa pretty fluently. I cant wait to be able to start on the local language as well. Inhambane is the beach province of MOZ. It is beautiful as you guys will see very soon. I've got to get some pictures developed. But they will be up as soon as I can get them up!

Speaking of photos. Everyone go to Noel's website to see pictures of my beautiful little nephew. He is gorgeous and everyone, keep him in your prayers please! Everyone have a happy turkey day and a merry Christmas if I don't talk to you. I'm cooking a candied yam casserole for all of us and I hope it goes over well.

Con todo amor
Ian

ps. letters et al take at least two weeks to get here. Anything and everything from home is wonderfully appreciated!

Oh the humanity

So here we go again guys, sorry about the typos in the last blog post. I realised that I had only 2 minutes left, so I started typing faster, than it just kept ticking and ticking away, so I just clicked send with out re-reading it. So anyway, let me apologise for the mass email. I've taken everyone off who wishes to be and will not send another one like that. I think I will stick to blogs. Gmail is a weird thing though. Every email that enters my mail box gets automatically entered into my address book. It could lead to trouble though too. :O) Won't do it again...

Now to the crazy news. I'm sitting here in Maputo (I love this city) at an internet cafe staying at Hotel Africa. I've just taken my first hot water shower in a month and nearly cried. I never thought it would make me so happy. Don't get me wrong, I love the bucket showers under the stars every night but sometimes, one is lazy. We have AC running today. Its 38 degrees outside and VERY humid. But, I'm loving life here. My Portuguese is coming along rapidly. I can already hold conversations with no difficulties. I did get highly confused witht he Spanish language but I've seen the pattern within the differences in the languages (Thank you German) and have even started picking up some Changana. the local african language.

Last week was the highlight of my time here so far I think. My Portuguese instructor is a regular Mister Rogers here on Mozambique. he has a regular Sunday morning LIVE show every week. Last week my friend Rhett and I were featured guests. A bunch of us from training took the Chapa(that is a whole 'nother topic) into the capital and then got picked up by the "studio" car for the ride to the TV studio. We come in and our introduced. eight of us dance the macarena and have a blast. There was a monitor on the wall behind us and I looked up once to see the camerazoomed in on my and Rhett's naldegas and show us shake it like they do. My teacher says we did him proud because I swear here in Moz, they learn how to shake their prosterior before they walk and long before they learn how to speak Portuguese! So then we are brought back stage to the "tan" room. We are handed cameras and told to act like tourists. So my friend Rhett and I are running around the studio acting like complete idiots (surprise surprise). Then the music stops and we're brought to the centre of the stage. Didinho then tells the audience that we like to learn how to dance like the Mozambicans. Music starts and we start dancing. We are up there with them clapping and hooting and hollaring for 5 or 6 minutes. When we got back to our seats, my friends asked us if we knew whether or not we would have to dance. We didn't. they were amazed, because they said it looked like it was coreographed!
On the way back to teh Chapa terminal, a man stops Rhett and me on the street. He congratulates us on our "bonito" debut on Mozambican TV!!!! It was crazy! The white community is not that big here so I wasn't surprised, but Rhett and I are seriously rockstars now. We cannot leave our houses without getting at least one kid running up to us for a hug. Its really cute and all of you definitely know that I'm lapping up every minute of it.

I'm excited for tomorrow because I am going to Massinga with my friend Justin. Its in Inhambane Province, about 9 hours from here. I get my own seat on the bus and everything! Those of you who have been to Latin America know what I am talking about. Inhambane Province has the best surfing and diving on the African Indian Coast so I will scope things out for those of you that would like to come and visit. Remember though my school year in January to October, so come and visit mid November-December to escape the snow!

Some side notes, everyone please keep my friends in Guatemala in your thoughts. They were destroyed by the latest hurricane to hit the coast and need all the help they can get. Keep on sending the emails and letters. I have gotten stuff from Monique, Mag and Margaret Cavanagh. It seems to take 2 weeks. Here are some thoughts for care packages if anyone wants to.
Film
Duct Tape
Gallon Freezer Bags~
Hand Sanitiser

Please please please send me text messages! It only costs a quarter. My wonderful siblings have my cell phone number and notes from home brighten my day. Thanks Kris!
I am saving all your emails and once I get to site, I will be replying.

Com tudo minha coração

Mano Ian

Muitas Coisas

Bom Dia do Maputo@!

First of all thank you all so much for your wonderful thoughts, emails and prayers. Unfortunately I won't be able to answer all the emails for some time to come. Email is slow! As the general pace of life is down here. Yet some how it manages to be manic as well. In case some of you have not heard yet. Felix Paul Alexis was born Oct 3rd and he is a LIBRA! He was very early but is doing okay. Everyone just keep him in your prayers. I'll teach him Changanna when I come back. So some amazing stories.

Let's see, the alarm clock I bought is totally useless because of the roosters that wake me up in the morning. I had to kill one the other day for my birthday feast. We made an offering to our ancestors, of which Mom was included. I wasn't allowed to spill any blood so I had to club the thing with a stick. It was suprisingly easy. I also hit it in the direction of the sun so it will bring me good luck and my ancestors "approve" of what I am doing.
I have made a reputation for myself as someone not to be messed with. The hawlkers are unbelievable and will try to sell you anything. so the other day I took a tampom out of my friends purse and tried to sell it to them!!!!

Com amor

Ianito

so...

So I get bitched at for not updating my blog and then I update it frequently with almost the EXACT same post. Oops. Anyway ya'll check out this website. go to useful prices

www.mozguide.com it should be very funny. I'm so excited, I can buy a live chicken for Mt.50,000 (Meticais) thats $2.10

HA!

interesting and annoying stuff

Hey You Guys!

Ya know, I've never actually seen that movie, yet that term rings in my head. I guess the movie achieved its purpose - almost twenty years later, someone who's never seen the movie still "quotes" it.

Moving on, I think Fate may be against me or something. I think I told you guys about my glasses getting lost in the ocean. Well, this week my USB port was acting up. It starting popping up with warnings that there are "power surges" on the port. I freak out only when my iPod doesn't get recognised. Then all of a sudden I try to print something and I notice a pin is bent inside. In a panic I run off to Best Buy and Circuit City looking for some sort of saving piece of technology. I find it in a PCMIA card $55! I have this strange feeling that I am repeating myself but I will only see once I publish this blog... oh well gotta go pack and enjoy the last day on the beach!

RIP Ami Jusitice

oh the humanity!!!!

So, get this, it is less than three weeks until I 'ship off' to Africa and my USB port on my laptop breaks!!!!! Now, in perfect form of my stupidity, my computer is old (2002 model) so I have only one USB port. The list is endless what runs out of there though. Digital Camera, iPod, USB stick... It would not be adventageous for me not to have a USB whilst in Mozambique. So in a frenzy I call my brother. He seems to be my computer whiz, good to have one that doesn't charge you an arm and a leg! He was asking me about the ports on the back of my computer and I had a PS2 port that you plug a mouse into, parrallel port etc. He says I could buy a little convertor to change that to USB. So I go to look for one and get laughed at. Then its off to Circuit City, no luck, but I know what I need now at least, back to Best Buy and I find a PCMIA Card with two USB ports in it. $55 later, my computer is fixed.

Speaking of brothers, when he and his VERY nice girlfriend came up to New Hampshire to visit ten days ago, we went kayaking. Believe it or not, it was the first time I have kayaked all summer. Its also the last because I'm leaving for Rhode Island on Thursday! Anyway, my dumbass went out kayaking with my glasses on. Everything is working perfectly until I start coming back in. Suddenly this big wave comes along, the ONLY big friggin' wave of the day, and I'm down. Noel is in the tandem kayak with Samantha and they laugh. I admit it was very funny but I lost my glasses. I have to go to Peace Corps with two pairs of glasses! ARGH Does fate not want me to leave this country?

A good friend of mine in Germany once told me that I shouldn't leave the States to relocate to Europe. Her reasoning was that this country needs people to show the general populace that a world exists outside of our borders. I mean only 45% of this country has a passport!!! In Europe a passport is an accepted fact of life! :O) Also, it helped to get out of said country if a war were to break out, which tended to happen often. So maybe I should stay?

NAAHHHH!!!!

There is one good piece of news within all the doom and gloom of the last week. Chief Justice, William Renquist's likely successor will be more moderate than himself. But I just warn you oh faithful readers, keep your passport updated. NOEL!

Just think of the time gone by

And I get friggin scared. Well, really not scared just excited and well yeah, SCARED. Its a scary thought to think that I will be calling Mozambique home for two years. True to my form I will get to feel more comfortable there and then not want to come back. I've got to stop doing this to myself. But I love it. Anyway, I know I am going to come back and think "Oh wow a bottle of Coke only costs 1 Metical! That is cheaper than 5,000 Meticais. But then it will dawn on me that 5,000 Meticais is 20 American cents.

I think the things that are bothering me the most is this summer did not work out as planned. I had hoped that my father would come up to visit. No go. I saw my brother and sister and one of my oldest and best friends but didn't see Mag nearly as much as I wanted to. I will spend some time with her before I go. Let me tell you guys, staying at her place is better than the Ritz. I woke up one morning to fresh cookies and the morning paper at my door. The night before I had gone in and my bed was turned down. I thought it was really cute!

The list of things I will have to get while i n CT just keeps growing and growing and growing. I think a lot of it has to do with the anxiety of not knowing where I will be living. I can't picture where it is I'll be staying and therefore don't really have an idea of how I have to pack. People let's get a fact straight here. I'm only allowed to bring 80 pounds with me. I've got to put my life into 80 POUNDS! That roughly 45 kilos for all you non-english mesures people. Like I dont know if I'll have to get a rain cover for my back pack, bring large freezer bags (good to store things in in the rainy season) my books, film, camera batteries, my god, the list just goes ON!!!! I will have help with my friend Annemarie though. She's going to bring me around to set up for the party and to pack up my life before I leave. I'm off to the clothing drop tomorrow to get rid of some clothes that Noel decided not to take!

Ianito signing off

Ticking time

Wow time is moving by very fast. I can't believe that its been that long since I've made any sort of comment on my blog. Sorry about that but I don't want to be the dorky boy who always writes on his blog, I did this and I did that. Guess what I've been sick for the past week, so I haven't done much. Anyway, 3 weeks from today I am leaving New Hampshire and 6 weeks from today I am leaving the States for Mozambique. Mozambique!!! This country is so foreign to everything I know except for the fact they speak Portuguese there. I have to be speaking this language very soon, anyone out there speak it who is reading this blog? I guess it hasn't sunk in yet. But I've got other things to talk about.

My sister is having a baby boy in January. I'm not going to be seeing him for two years though. She is thinking of Elijah as a name possibly. But the best news is that the blood clot that she told us the doctor's discovered in the baby's brain is only in the emniotic fluid and therefore will pass!

Tick tick tick time is going by and pretty soon I'll be coming back to start my life anew.

A perspective

So I think I am going to talk about perspectives today - it seems fitting, especially after what I have experiences today. First of all, check out www.bbc.co.uk for the biggest news of the day - at least from my perspective. The IRA, Irish Republican Army, terrorists to some national heroes to others, have decided to officially end the armed struggle that they have fought for the past 36 years in Northern Ireland against the British occupation of the Emerald Isle. Many Protestants in Northern Ireland are very skeptical of what this statement means. However, in my humble perspective, this time will be different. Before, the IRA always used one of their own to
"proclaim" the ceasefire. This time they used a former IRA prisoner to tell the world about their new deal. I am a little optimistic, however, I must remember that it is the IRA. Even in a perfect world, they couldn't become a non-violent group over night. They probably don't even know how many people are in their own organisation. But I really WANT to be optimistic! I WANT to believe in the goodness of the people and the exasperation of the Republican (NOT conservative) Irish after the Northern Bank heist of £26 million in December 2004. Enough is enough! Unfortunately, I think the Rev. Iain Paisley (about as reverend as Al Sharpton) will say "show us thedisarmermentt in pictures or video" - to which theIRAA will say "NO BLOODY WAY" ------ and so the circle may continue.

The other thing I heard today was from my manager at work. He was telling me about how last summer, he was discussing the fairy and gnome myths of Celtic Britain with a friend who showed up at the shop. Well, apparently, there was a gay guy living in the flat behind the shop who overheard this story. He took it asharassmentt from the manager and his friend. He called the cops. The cop came and talked to my manager. He says, "Isn't it a bit weird for two grown men to be discussing fairies et al." My manager sayspointe blank, NO! Heretortss with,

Isn't it a bit weird for millions of adults to congregate weekly to celebrate how much they love a zombie? All they are,aree blood-thiry,cannibalisticc, zombie worshipers! To which the policeman left.

Any thoughts?

GOD BLESS YOU

Okay, I've not started to prothlesize the faith, even though Mag has been sending me heaps of info about a friend of hers who is a Catholic missionary in Uganda. I don't think this would make my friend Liz in England very happy because she was a little ticked off when I told her that I was applying to Peace Corps. See she was born in Tonga and Peace Corps is there. She just doesn't agree with what they have to say because she has had many bad experiences whilst living in Tonga with those "Yanks" that knew better than the Tongans even though they didn't speak the language, let alone not know the culture. But hey, I'm going to learn Portuguese and either Koti, Shona, Zulu, Swahili et al. Who knows which language?

Anyway, tonight was a required apperance down the beach at the Surf club. Everyone who reads this knows exactly what I am talking about. Rich, scary pretentious white people who ask me EVERY week, whether, A. we've met before B. if I'm my cousin Mike C. How I'm related to Ed and Rene yada yada YADA. But strangely enough, tonight was fun. The manager of the club had his band in for a bit of live music. They were REALLY good. The lead singer was a perfect mimic and could sing you name it almost perfectly. Anywho, my uncle, being who he is, decided to start talking to the drummer. He shows me off whenever he can, so he started talking about how he wants to visit me in Mozambique. So we start talking and the drummer just turns around to me and says GOD BLESS YOU! WHY i wanted to shout at him! What the fuck am I doing that is so GD noble? I just dont get it. But if they want to feel that I am some noble Americanesque Christ Figure, sacrificing my livelihood for two years to help the heathen of Africa, they are fucking wrong. I just want to travel. Bom viaje!

Bua noite mis amigos

Isso e Portuguese nao e espanhol

Its been/will be a long time

I haven't been updating my blog on a regular basis because so much has been happening in my life. I'm trying to put together a party for myself as a graduation/going-away thing at St. Jerome's Church in Norwalk. I fell like I have to go around on tip-toe concerning my father and his wife and frankly I'm really sick of it. But, so many people think I have to do that to maintain calm. I really want this party, because I feel that it is going to be such a long time before I will see any of these people again. I've asked certain old friends of my mother to investigate what a day at the church would entail. I just feel that if I didn't step of this, it would never materialize. Anyone in agreement with me?

I've also got to start paying off my student loans now. I've actually got to go and do that right now. Its $147.50 per month for the next ten years. Thats a shit load of money. In Australia and England you don't have to pay back any money until you are earning over certain amounts of money. Why can't we do something like that here?

My sister and I have been talking about my father and his emotional retardation alot recently. Its just something that I cannot comprehend. His wife is a type of being that I cannot fathom the amount of hatred within this woman. But I have had enough of perpetuating the negativity. There is so many other things in life to deal with and I have to focus on that. My aunt told me after I mentioned that I ican't believe for every evil person in the world there are ten beautiful/caring individuals in my life. And fuck it I am off to Mozambique in 2 months! But that is the problem. I do not want to go off to Africa with this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach that my father is falling down the drain...into the vaginal vortex.

Speaking of Mozambique, I, like a dork, have been doing my research and learning bits of Portuguese. Its going to be a fun language. But the Mozambican money is called a METICAL. It is the most worthless money in the world. The current exchange rate is US$1 = MT24,500 and counting. I say and counting because I checked the exchange rate twice today. It was 24,250 the first time and then a round 24,500 the second time round. They have bills in common circulation up to MT500,000 which is only US$20. I wonder how much that will buy. I read an article on www.mozambiquenews.com that public transport in Maputo, the capital city, was raised MT 5,000 to MT7,000 - from 20 american cents to 28 american cents.

Hmmmmm....

PS

Its one of my best friends birthday today. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BETH!!! 22!

So it finally happened

The past two days have been full of news about London. That expensive, sunless, wonderful city I consider home has been torn apart today. 4 bombs exploded across the very center of the city at the morning rush hour. Having lived in London for the past 3 years on and off, I feel like I can understand the panic in the city. I know in my heart though that the British will keep their stiff upper lip to the nth degree. I think the reason I am so knocked around by this attack is because one of the bombs exploded right across the road from my friend's flat. The bus that exploded was right near a park that I frequented. What puzzles me is that the British people don't take the shit that their government shovels in their faces on a daily basis. They tend to excercise the ability that differentiates us humans from the apes...they QUESTION!!! Everyone QUESTIONS! There have been WEEKLY protests against the war and people are just generally more interested what goes on in other countries. My entire last year in London was spent under the threat of a possible attack from Al-Qaeda. Why does stuff happen like this?

I spent most of the morning on the phone with London to make sure friends of mine stayed away from Central London and were safe. It worked out too that a friend of mine who I ended badly on when I left in April and I talked. He was happy that I called him and it made me feel better. His girlfriend (also a friend of mine) couldn't reach him in London and I was able to reach her. I just calmed her incredibly. It was nice to be able to help a bit. Right now I am trying to take my mind of what is happening in London. Everyone please keep the city in your thoughts, it will need it.

Wow, its been quite eventful.

I really don't know what happened the 12th. I think a bunch of people were here and I get very confused when people show up because I'm used to being home alone. I don't know exactly what to do with myself. I can't believe though what has happened in the past almost month. First of all, everyone who reads this already knows that I will be an uncle. That took up alot of space in my brain for the past month. You see unfortunately, I'm going to miss the birth because (now here's for the other big news) I'm going to Mozambique in September of this year. But I was told under no circumstances what so ever am I to postpone my posting with Peace Corps. According to Peace Corps, I will be teaching English at a secondary school or a technical institute in a bigger provincial city in Mozambique - Maputo, Beira or Nampula. 1 Million, 500,000 and 300,000 people respectively, so I guess I don't have to worry about being on the end of the world. :) For those of you out there asking where Moz. is, look at a map of Africa and it is at the bottom of the continent, next to South Africa. Portuguese is the official language and 16 other tribal languages are spoken throughout. I have the chance of speaking shona, swahili, or koti, in the region where they believe I will be placed.

Yesterday I spent the entire day on the porch filling in the reems of paperwork for Peace Corps. I had to fill out paperwork for visas and a new passport. Then today I had to sign papers for life insurance and personal property insurance and set up a bank account with my father's name on it as well only to realize that I have no money to do this! :) Ahh to be back in college. If any of ya'll have more question send me an email at ian.hefele@gmail.com and I'll fill ya in.

I

Laughing "alone" and drunk

So, my cousin Lauren and four other people came up to visit today at the beach. It has been an interesting evening. The booze has flowed. I'm drunk and just wanted to say that we are all "Watching" Eddie Izzard. I'm the only one actually watching the telly, EVERYONE ELSE IS ASLEEP!!!!

Schlaft Gut
Slaap goed
duermen bien
sleep well

Rebuttle

Okay, my last post may have been a little too much of a teenie bopper moment but I think I deserve a chance for a rebuttle. I'm not sorry that I still like Liza Minnelli. She was/is a talented performer. And, she has recorded things within the past 49 years. Considering that she is only 59ish, that leaves pretty much her entire career to choose from. Sorry but I don't think I have to justify my taste in music. According to me, there are a lot of artists out there who you may like and are without a doubt less of a needy personality than Liza is, but I may think they haven't recorded anything worth listening to in the past 49 years. Many of them haven't. How ever I would NEVER say that you couldn't or shouldn't listen to some artist or another. I will admit that Liza is a looney toon but, those are typical traits of someone who has grown up so far removed from reality her life should be classified under fiction in the library. I'm just so sick of people trying to force their tastes/beliefs on others!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH MY GOD!!!!

I just found out that Liza Minnelli is performing at Hyannis Cape Cos in about 6 weeks and the tickets are only $65! Thats cheap for Liza! Should I go? Maybe this time I can meet her without her arschloch of a husband pushing me away I know, I'm a dork, go ahead and laugh!

A quick update

Anyone out there reading this? I just wanted to let you all know that I have an audition at a theatre in Portsmouth this weekend. Keep your fingers crossed for me because it would be a good diversion like acting always is. Anyone that I don't know who is reading this, let me know!

Ianito

HOOORAY!!!!!!!!

I just saw a TV commericial that a movie is being made of Fantastic Four, actually it has already been made! I Can't wait and OMG tomorrow is going to be JUNE where did this year go?